Highs, Lows, and Lasting Love

Wow today was one of the biggest emotional roller coasters I've ridden ever. Early morning had me feeling that I was on the top of the world, with the rest of the day just me riding the avalanche down the mountain. Sigh. But, hey, at least I realized what lasting love really is. I think? :D

Why the hell am I even thinking of lasting love. Oh, right, theme for our Mediscene performance. At first I questioned it. Is there really lasting love? Why are there break-ups and divorces then? Only during the early hours of the morning did I realize that lasting love does exist. I won't mention Jesus because I wanna use an example applicable to all. Who then do I wanna use as an example? All those still hoping for the love of their life to come to them, but are happy that they are too. I'd say I'm close to it. Nah scratch that I am it. I just hope she's happy where she is now :) he's a good guy anyways. I'd even grudgingly say they look good together. Ahwell. Sabi nga nila, di naman masamang umasa. :) Maybe someday. When all is said and done. Or whatever. For now, carpe diem. Seize the day!

Merry Christmas to everyone :) at ang mga SMP dyan hoy! Don't be sad. There's more to life than having a special girl/guy during Christmas :) at sa mga meron! Ingatan :) and be happy!

Signing off,

-theguyintheshadows

A Little Girl and A Kitten

Weird title for a post. But I named it that cause of one thing I saw a while ago. Anyway. First legit Christmas break day :D after days of full schedules. Another full sched tomorrow, but hey, better than rotting here at home playing all day o_o My brother's friends came over for some game time with him and I think he had fun. Also, my cousin from Canada brought his games and I'm happy to say he had fun too :) him not having any brothers to play with there in Canada makes it all the more awesome to see him having fun and being part of the boys :> I also cooked (read: microwaved) food for them, cause I felt guilty after eating so much canned goods o_O oh well growing boy's gotta eat.

I also went out to get my gift for my brother and to go to confession. Turns out there was no schedule today but it still felt good to just sit and take in the solemn church. Also, when I got my brother's gift, I bought them bibingka which is something I think we all enjoyed, especially my cousin who rarely gets to taste such treats.

So, overall, today was a pretty fun day :)

Now, the title of the post. While I was waiting for confession, I heard a soft meow to my left and found a little kitten looking at me. I smiled, cause I rarely see something so innocent. I then spotted a little girl talking to her mom who has going to lead the Rosary there. Something then sparked in my mind. The idea that the kitten was somehow the animal spirit of the girl. I just felt, in my mind, that the two had something between them. The little kitten then walked towards the front, where the girl spotted and petted him/her. And I smiled, because I remembered the innocence of childhood and youth in these two souls. They may not really be part of each other, but they served as a reminder to me, amidst all this chaos, that innocent souls exist, and that is what we strive to protect in this world. What I will strive to protect and care for in this world, as a doctor and as a person.

"When we are children we seldom think of the future. This innocence leaves us free to enjoy ourselves as few adults can. The day we fret about the future is the day we leave our childhood behind" - Patrick Rothfuss

Signing off,

-theguyintheshadows-

P.S. Good thing I didn't go to Sirak today. I sense the pattern forming. And I don't even like talking about it. More on it some other time maybe. When it can't be held back anymore.

Broken rules lead to broken hearts

My heart's a mess right now. Not as much as other people, but still, messed up. Why? Some may say fate, some may say it would logically end up like this. I'd like to think that I messed up both ways. How?

I broke one rule.

I liked someone I should never have liked.

Because she was a close friend.

And my book of rules state that that is one of the types of people you should never risk losing.

Did I want to lose her? No, of course not. Did I want us to be something more? Once a long time ago, yes. Now, I still hate myself for saying yes. Yeah broken rules, broken hearts. Whatever.

If given the chance, would I go back and change the past? No. Cause anything that can go wrong, will go wrong.

Get up, move on. Maybe not right now. Some other time.

Signing off,

-theguyintheshadows-